Back before the rise of the Internet and the complete submergence of society in computers, tablets and cell phones, there was a quaint information discovery mechanism called the library’s card catalog. The bigger the library, the bigger its card catalog’s listing of books and other materials. Upkeep of the catalog was constant – adding cards, removing cards, and revising cards (often with the help of an electric eraser).
This produced an ongoing flow of discard catalog cards that could be used for notes, rather than simply throwing them away, as the flip sides of the cards were usually blank. When I started at the Library of Congress, there were always piles of cards that could be used. They were sort of like unsticky Post-it notes, which had not yet become ubiquitous. I used the waste cards regularly for business related and personal purposes.
Recently, in going through some boxes of old stuff, I found such a card that I had posted above my desk at work for years. It read:
- Don’t Be A Jerk
- Don’t Be A Snob
- Don’t Think Badly of Others
- Be Kind
- Be Understanding
- Be Nice
The printed flip side of the card provided information on a book by Amy Clampitt titled, “The Summer Solstice: Poems,” published in 1983. It was a limited edition work that was printed as “a continuous strip folded accordion style.” I am not sure why this card was available to be used as a note card by me, but there is a clue in today’s record for the same book in the Library’s online catalog. The online record says that the Library owns copy 28 while the printed card showed copy 22. Perhaps the printed card was wrong and had to be replaced.
Whatever the case, I am positive that the information on the printed side of the card had no bearing on my use of the blank side as a palette of specific behavioral guidance. Why did I need such reminders? Well, I guess I realized at that time that I could be a jerk and a snob and was given to thinking badly of others. In addition, I wasn’t always kind, understanding and nice. I felt that I needed to change in order to have a more successful and pleasant career.
I am a list maker. There is something about the act of making a list that satisfies my inner need for organization. It also helps to clear the clutter from my mind. I have “to do” lists for work and for home and lists for just about everything else, including possible topics for blog posts. Of course, I have a bucket list for places I want to visit and experiences I hope to enjoy. So, it is not surprising that I created and referred for years to a list of positive personality traits that I wanted to internalize.
I do not know if this list sprung fully-formed from within me, or if I cribbed it from a book I read. Early on in my career and before I became a supervisor/manager, I read many self-help books and autobiographies of successful people. This list may have come from one of those sources. Obviously, regardless of the origin, I felt that these were characteristics I needed to embrace.
The behaviors themselves seem kind of Sunday school-ish, especially the last three – be kind, understanding and nice. However, those were some of the aspects that I admired most in other people, both those whom I knew personally and those whom I thought I knew by reading books. Those attributes seemed like a great approach to making it through life, to achieve goals and to be happy.
The first three behaviors – don’t be a jerk, a snob or think badly of others – were somewhat difficult to reach, as I had grown up being a satirical smart aleck. Throw a good dose of cynicism into the mix, and that’s who I was, at least through college. As I later matured, some of those rough edges smoothed down, but they were still there. Then, as I endeavored to implement the objectives on the catalog card, it was relatively easy to not give voice to such negative impulses, but it was much harder to stop having those thoughts to begin with.
It’s now been at least three decades since I wrote that list and probably at least two decades since I took it down from daily viewing at my desk. For the most part, those traits are now a big part of who I am, and they have served me well as a supervisor and manager. One can be an effective leader while being empathetic and caring. It has worked for me.