(Note – My lovely wife Barbara has given her permission for me to relate this tale.)
Barbara is the safest driver I know. She takes great care when behind the wheel, doesn’t give in to distractions and follows all road rules and speed limits. She has been pulled over twice in fifty years of driving. The first one was an aberration. The second was the result of an almost unbelievable coincidence.
Her initial cop stop happened in Philadelphia, on a dark night in an unfamiliar area. She turned left onto a one-way street, which was actually two-way on the other side of the intersection. Luckily, there was no traffic coming in the other direction. When pulled over and told by the officer that she was going the wrong way on a one way street, she was flabbergasted, shocked and apologetic.
“Oh my God, I could have hit somebody!” she stammered. The policeman was amused and let her go with a warning. He even gave her the peace sign.
The legendary flashing incident was something else altogether. It took place in Lanham, Maryland, a suburb of Washington, in 1983. Finns Lane exists for a couple of miles, traversing a residential neighborhood and serving as a shortcut between a couple of major thoroughfares and the nearby New Carrollton Metro station. It had an appropriate low speed limit that was often greatly exceeded by drivers who were in a hurry. Unbeknownst to Barbara on that day many years ago, it had become an enforcement focus of the Prince George’s County Police Department.
We owned a Datsun 210 back then, and the mechanism to spray washer fluid on the windshield had stopped working. So, Barbara took it to a Nissan dealership, using Finns Lane uneventfully to get to Annapolis Road where it was located. She waited while the issue was addressed and reportedly corrected. Then she headed back to use Finns Lane again to return to our apartment. As she drove, she tried to test the windshield fluid. She flipped the switch, but nothing happened. As she moved down the road, she kept trying the washer fluid, with no result. Barbara became angry, assuming that she would have to turn around and return to the dealership.
The next thing she knew, she came upon a group of police cars on the side of the road, and an officer was pointing at her to pull over. She dutifully did so.
The officer came to her window and asked, “Do you know that it is illegal to warn other drivers of a speed trap?”
Completely confused and in all innocence, she replied, “Yes, I know that it is illegal.” She had no idea why she had been pulled over.
The officer took her driver’s license and went back to his car to write a ticket. When he returned, Barbara finally figured out what was going on. She had been flipping the wrong switch and had been flashing her headlights rather than trying to spray washer fluid on the windshield. And she had been doing so as she drove into a speed trap!
Barbara tried to explain what had happened, but the officer just gave her a quizzical look and left the ticket with her. The ticket stated that she was charged with a violation of Section 22, subsection 227-E, “operating motor vehicle with flashing lights.” The ticket noted that she had the right to stand trial or waive that right and pay the fine – twenty dollars.
Now, twenty dollars may not sound like much – it’s comparable to about $62 today. But we weren’t making a whole lot of money at that time. And there was a principle at play. Although Barbara was technically flashing her headlights, she didn’t know she was doing it and certainly was not trying to warn other motorists of the speed trap. So, she opted for a trial.
On the trial date, she went to the District Court of Maryland in Hyattsville, and found herself in a crowded courtroom, with all manner of people there to have their traffic issues adjudicated. When the judge called Barbara’s case, she learned that the ticket-issuing policeman was on vacation and was not in the courtroom. Then, she told the judge what had happened.
It’s been a while, and Barbara doesn’t remember if the judge was a man or a woman. However, she does remember what the judge did after Barbara concluded her story. The judged laughed. Then the judge dismissed the ticket. Even though it made her look silly in front of a judge and a courtroom of strangers, Barbara was able to prevail, defend a principle and save us twenty bucks. And she never again mistook the headlight switch for the windshield washer fluid switch again.